Since I was a little child I would worry about intense topics. It probably started when I was around five years old and I thought I could save the world from all its miseries. When I realized a few years later that I couldn’t do that on my own, I was devastated. Actually devastated. I remember crying realizing that just me wouldn’t do the trick. So yeah, I guess it’s in my nature to worry more than the average person should.
In some ways worrying can also be a good thing. For example I always brought a second pair of gym clothes to school. I mean, what if my gym clothes would suddenly break or tear and I wouldn’t have anything to wear during gym class? A normal person might think, well then you skip gym class. An insanely overthinking type of person like me, always carried extra gym clothes. They actually came in handy and were used most of the classes. Well, not by me. Usually by a classmate who forgot their own clothes.
Over the years I did learn to relax a bit more and not worry so much. Carrying heavy handbags were actually starting to hurt my shoulder. Cause the bigger the bag the more stuff I would carry. You know, the stuff you might need, just in case.. In my handbag I learned to narrow it down to the highly essential objects. All the other things, like extra clothes or even shoes, should be left at home. No more extra weight. Because apart of the actual weight, the thinking of everything started to be a burden that was weighing on me mentally.
It was time for some yoga and meditation. No more worrying about what if this or that goes wrong. In the end what could really happen? What if it goes wrong? There is always a solution, nothing you can’t handle. Definitely nothing that could have been ‘saved’ by something in my handbag. You might laugh, but the yoga really did help. The breathing in and breathing out has some use to it. Even the dogs seemed to like my meditation pillow. I imagine total relaxation is what all minds need at times.
It also helped to be strict with myself. Whenever I started to worry about something useless I stopped myself. Like actually say ‘stop’ to yourself. It might seem ridiculous, but whatever does the trick, right? And if you do that often enough, suddenly you notice you don’t worry about those silly things anymore. You don’t need an extra pair of shoes, sweater, scarf, gym clothes or whatever in your bag. Also you don’t need to check if the lights are out ten times before leaving the house. Or if you really closed the bedroom window.
The last hurdle to tackle is to not worry in my sleep. In my sleep? Yeah, that’s exactly what I mean. During your sleep you dream to process everything that happens during the day. Well, I learned a lot of people don’t remember their dreams or don’t dream at all. I dream every night and up to five dreams a night. During college I would actually solve issues I was studying for in my dream. I would wake up with the answer that I needed for a paper or a test I had to take. Sounds exhausting.. I know.. it was useful, but exhausting.
So now I try to use my yoga and meditation also before going to sleep. I haven’t found the key answer for the dreaming issue yet, but one step at a time. At least I tackled the continuously worrying throughout the day problem. And I must say, I am a lot happier and I literally feel a lot lighter without the overthinking things. Because a wise man once said: ‘Don’t worry, be happy’. I’ll just try to follow that philosophy.